The Gradual Realisation

Around age 31, I deleted all the news apps from my phone. I needed them briefly during COVID to keep up with the constantly changing business rules, but once that settled, they went again. The final deletion came a couple of years ago when I realised that most of what appeared in my feed was either depressing me or had absolutely no relevance to my actual life.

I’m quite sensitive to negative content – it tends to stick with me. And I had to ask myself: what’s the point of consuming information that upsets me when I can’t do anything about it? There’s a difference between staying informed and being traumatised by every tragedy happening globally.

Was I trying to stay in my little bubble? Perhaps. But I decided my mental wellbeing was worth protecting. I can always seek out information when I actually need it – I don’t need push notifications about every awful thing happening in the world. And let’s face it, there’s enough of it for pretty regular phone pinging.

It’s Not Just Media

I won’t pretend I’m a saint with food. I grew up on cheese – literally. My family used to joke that I’d turn into cheese because it was about all I’d eat. I was what we now know as ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder), though back then I was just called a “picky eater.”

The reality? I’d choked quite badly as a child, and it caused significant trauma. Even now, I sometimes worry about choking. I rarely buy grapes for my kids – and when I did buy them when they were young, I was absolutely adamant about how they were cut up. “Death by grape” is a term for a reason, and I wasn’t taking chances. I even get a bit twichy if I eat alone from time to time but I surpress it well and its a fleeting thought, very occasionally now.

I didn’t really get more adventurous with food until I was 15 or 16, working in kitchens and training to be a chef. Chefs taste everything for flavour and to check if the meal fits together. It forced me to expand what I consumed, even if gradually. I even started to be able to eat steak…The amount fo chewing involved to feel safe enough to swallow it meant it was something I never entertained growing up.

You won’t literally turn into a beef burger if all you eat is burgers, but your body will reflect what you consistently feed it. Energy levels, mood, clarity, physical health – it all connects to what you consume.

On a side note, if you feel like ARFID has affected your life in a negative way and continues to do so then have a look at Vanessa’s website as I know she can help you heel.

And Then There Are Relationships

The same principle applies to the people we spend time with. We’ve all had friends who leave us feeling drained rather than energised, haven’t we?

I’m a naturally helpful person – I genuinely like supporting people. But I’ve learned that there’s a difference between being supportive and becoming someone’s unpaid therapist. When every single conversation is heavy, and there’s no reciprocal energy coming back, that’s consuming something that depletes you.

You don’t need to dramatically end friendships or have big falling-outs. Sometimes it’s just about noticing which relationships energise you and which ones don’t, then making conscious choices about where you invest your time and energy. And at least doing something to fill your cup either side of spending time with those who drain you.

Developing self-awareness about these patterns helps you recognise when something isn’t serving you anymore. And that’s valuable information.

What I Consume Now

These days, I hardly watch television at all. When I do, it’s a genuinely good film – something that either lifts me up or makes me think in productive ways or a good documentary. Susan Calman is one of my go tos. I’m pretty sure it’s not possible to be miserable around her. I listen to podcasts, usually about personal development or topics that genuinely interest me. I take baths with books. Real, physical books that don’t buzz with notifications. I did recently get pulled into watching MAFS (Married at First Sight). Even though I wasn’t going to watch it, and didn’t actually know it was on till everyone started talking about it. I started to watch it because all my friends were but quickly tailed off after the weddings were done because it wasn’t filling my cup.

I’m not perfect – I’m absolutely prone to a doom scroll on Instagram or Facebook. But I’ve started curating my feed intentionally. If I see a red flag – someone consistently posting negativity, drama, or content that makes me feel worse – I flick down their profile. Is this a one-off or a pattern? If it’s a pattern, they’re gone. Unfriend or unfollow. No procrastinating, just gone.

It might sound harsh, but it’s self-preservation. Social media algorithms feed you more of what you engage with. If you engage with misery, you’ll get more misery. If you engage with inspiration, growth, and joy, that’s what fills your feed.

The Pattern You Can’t Ignore

Do you see the pattern?

Media consumption. Food. Relationships. Digital feeds. It all adds up to what you’re putting into your system – mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual. And what you consistently consume shapes who you become and how you experience life.

Research backs this up. A study published in PMC (PubMed Central) found that exposure to a stream of negative media news is detrimental to overall wellbeing and mental health. The research showed that whilst news consumers pay more attention to negative news, extensive media exposure perpetuates stress and is associated with symptoms of psychopathology. Conversely, news avoidance can have a positive effect on mental wellbeing. The same principle works in reverse: consistent negative inputs create lasting negative effects.

Two hours a week of EastEnders equals 104 hours a year of fictional misery. Imagine spending those 104 hours learning something new, connecting with people you love, or simply being present with your own thoughts. The compound effect would be remarkable.

Nine Ways to Improve What You Consume

Right, let’s get practical. Here are nine ways you can start improving what you consume to genuinely love your life more:

1. Audit Your Media Consumption

Track what you watch and listen to for one week. Be honest – write it all down. News programs, social media scrolling, television shows, podcasts, YouTube/TikTok rabbit holes. Then ask yourself: How much of this actually serves my wellbeing? How much is just habit?

You might be shocked by how much time you give to content that leaves you feeling worse, not better.

2. Delete News Apps (Or Limit Them Severely)

Most of what appears in news apps is either depressing, enraging, or completely irrelevant to your actual life. Yes, stay informed about major events, but you don’t need push notifications about every tragedy happening globally.

Try this: Delete the apps for one month. If you genuinely need information about something, you’ll actively seek it out. What you’ll discover is how much noise you were consuming without realising it.

3. Curate Your Social Media Feed Ruthlessly

Stop following people who consistently make you feel bad. It doesn’t matter if they’re family, old friends, or influencers everyone else loves. If their content drains you, it goes.

My rule: When I see a post that triggers negativity, I check their profile. One-off rant about a bad day? Fine. Consistent pattern of drama and misery? Unfollow. No procrastinating, no guilt. Just done.

Replace them with people who inspire growth, share genuine wisdom, or simply bring joy. Your feed should uplift you, not deplete you. You’ll then get more suggestions of similar to follow which is a win win in my book.

4. Notice How Food Affects Your Mood and Energy

I’m not going to lecture you about clean eating – that’s not the point. But start paying attention to how different foods make you feel.

During my years giving up sugar for Lent, I became acutely aware of the post-sugar slump. We’d sometimes have pizza as a team lunch to celebrate, and afterwards? I could barely drive home, let alone be productive. The carb coma is real.

You don’t need to overhaul your entire diet overnight. Just start noticing the patterns. What gives you sustained energy? What makes you crash? What helps you think clearly versus what leaves you foggy?

5. Notice Which Relationships Energise vs. Drain You

Pay attention to how you feel after spending time with different people. Do you feel lighter and more energised, or heavier and depleted?

This isn’t about abandoning friends who are going through difficult times – we all need support sometimes. It’s about noticing patterns. If someone consistently drains your energy without any reciprocal care or consideration, that’s information worth having.

You don’t need dramatic confrontations. Just make conscious choices about where you invest your time and energy. Spend more time with people who lift you up, and less with those who pull you down.

6. Replace Passive Consumption with Active Engagement

Instead of mindlessly scrolling or watching whatever’s on, make conscious choices about how you spend your time.

Listen to a podcast that teaches you something. Read a book that challenges your thinking. Watch a film that moves you or makes you laugh genuinely. Take a walk without your phone and just think.

The shift from passive to active consumption might sound small, but it completely changes the quality of what you’re taking in. You’re choosing rather than defaulting.

7. Develop Real Self-Awareness

This is the foundation for everything else. You can’t change what you don’t notice.

Start paying attention to your patterns. What triggers you? What energises you? When do you reach for your phone? What makes you feel anxious versus calm? Which people bring out your best versus your worst?

Deeply understanding yourself allows you to start limiting behaviours that don’t serve you. It’s not about judgement – it’s about clarity. Once you see the patterns, you can choose whether to continue them.

8. Create Screen-Free Zones (And Actually Enforce Them)

We don’t have a TV in our kitchen or dining area, and we don’t have one in our bedroom either. It was a deliberate choice to create spaces where screen consumption isn’t the default activity.

With everyone having handheld devices now, it’s not as simple as just removing the television. You need the self-discipline to actually enforce boundaries with yourself and your family.

In our house, the rule is no devices at the table when we’re all eating together. It requires self-awareness to catch yourself reaching for your phone out of habit. It requires consistency to gently remind kids (and sometimes yourself) that we’re here together, not half-present whilst scrolling.

This isn’t about being militant or rigid. It’s about creating spaces where other types of consumption can happen – conversation, presence, actual connection. The kind that’s increasingly rare in a world of constant digital distraction.

9. Give Yourself Permission to Protect Your Wellbeing

You don’t have to consume everything that’s offered to you. Not every news story, not every friend’s drama, not every piece of content that appears in your feed.

When I first deleted news apps, I felt a bit guilty about it. Shouldn’t I stay informed? But I realised that being constantly bombarded with negative information I couldn’t do anything about wasn’t helping anyone – it was just making me feel worse.

Give yourself permission to be selective. It’s not selfish to protect your mental and emotional wellbeing. It’s necessary if you want to show up as your best self for the people and things that actually matter.

The Bottom Line About Why Everything You Consume Matters

Everything you consume matters. The media, the food, the relationships, the digital content – it all becomes part of your internal landscape. It shapes your thoughts, your mood, your energy, your beliefs about what’s possible and what’s normal.

I spent 15 years consuming fictional misery from EastEnders, using it as a benchmark for my own life. Years absorbing news that brought me down. Time giving energy to relationships that weren’t reciprocal.

The shift to consuming more consciously hasn’t made me perfect. I still doom scroll sometimes. I still eat foods that make me feel rubbish. I still occasionally give too much energy to people who aren’t reciprocating.

But the difference is awareness. Now I notice. And noticing gives you choice. Choice means you can actually do something about it. And that’s how you start to actually love your life more

So what are you consuming? And more importantly, is it serving the life you actually want to live?

What consumption patterns have you noticed in your own life? I’d love to hear in the comments below.

---

Remember, loving life more isn’t about perfection. It’s about making conscious choices that serve your wellbeing, one small shift at a time.

If you found this helpful, subscribe to our newsletter for more practical ways to love life more. We share weekly insights for building simple practices that make a genuine difference.

Enjoyed this blog about why everything you consume matters?

Check out our other recent blogs here – Blog – Love Life More